Happy New Year

Posted in About Me, Work on January 1st, 2002 by Дмитрий

Well, I’m finally feeling conscious enough to update. A new month/year begins, with its requisite web site maintenance duties. Had a wonderfully incredible time with David for the past few nights, and unfortunately managed to acquire an awful bug yesterday afternoon.

But no matter how horrible I feel in the morning, I will have to go into work. The loss of the office help has landed me with the dubious role of managing an extensive legal and administrative clean-up job this week. This will include hiring new office help and dealing with odious city officials and non-paying customers… It won’t be pretty, especially if I’m not feeling any better come tomorrow.

But at least I managed to get my first good New Years smooch last night. With someone I respect and care about. Whilst watching the evil Dick Clark. Happy new year. Hopefully it treats me as well as the better pieces of 2001 treated me, if not better…


Posted in Health on January 2nd, 2002 by Дмитрий

More than 48 hours later and my stomach still isn’t feeling entirely normal. If this lasts more than another day or so, I’m going to Herr Doktor.

In other news, my day at work was surprisingly manageable thanks to two things: my dad wasn’t around to drive everyone into a panic, and all the problems he spent last week bracing me for were a total overreaction. You gotta love parents. And they used to say I made mountains out of mole hills.

I’m taking a bit of an email sabbatical whilst I try to figure out what went wrong with my old email service, so don’t feel bad if I’m not getting back to you. Hopefully I can eventually get the thing working efficiently enough to manage the increasingly large volume coming to me the last few weeks…

Now to drown myself in more Pepto. Then it’s bank, bills, Von’s, and coffee with Amy… Though I might be going with just the soda water tonight.

Blorg 2.0

Posted in Health on January 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

The ailment continues with no end in site. Somehow I managed to get absolutely nothing done yesterday, as well. Not like I have meals getting in the way or anything. I wish I could actually manage some solid food right now…

Anyway, I’m getting mildly annoyed by the frequency of porn and sex searches on this site, but not annoyed enough to actually think of doing anything about it…

Still waiting for the ForMac Studio machine to arrive…


Posted in Economics, Health on January 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

I filed my state taxes today. The Feds won’t take my return until the 10th, so not only did I not get Dubya’s $300 extortion refund, I have to wait those additional excruciating days to find out how much my real extortion refund will be.

Anyway, Sacramento was kind to me, and I may actually be able to afford that iPod before the month is over… And the printer too… The Xmas disappointment may be made up after I hear from Uncle Sam.

The stomach still feels like a pressurized tin can at 40,000 feet, and I’m starting to think that it could all be the fact that I haven’t had a good Fresno Mexican meal in almost 2 weeks. I usually manage to fit about 2 in each week, considering Fresno’s got some of the best authentic Mexican food around. I think I may just go grab some take-out tomorrow and polish it all off, and hope that I don’t have to immediately bolt to the toilet afterwards. But it may actually cure me…

On the plus side of my health issues, the coffee shop last night convinced me that my original goal of giving up cigarettes after I ran out isn’t soon enough. I threw away the last of my cigs today, and don’t plan on lighting again. Not even cloves or cigars, which were usually my vice-of-last-resort during my ‘quitting’ phases. With the stomach ailment still going, any thought of smoking just makes me nauseated right now.

So I go to watch Family Guy and they managed to remove it again. Bloody hell.

Consumptive Whore

Posted in Health on January 5th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I decided to convalesce alone this weekend. Which would be best, I suppose, considering my recent gastrointestinal status. Strangely, however, I awoke today feeling intriguingly normal. The test will be when I take a break from my all-too-comfortable lethargy to grab a Torta Carnitas from SuperTaco. It’s been over a month since I’ve had one. If Mr. Tummy can handle it, I’ll declare my illness officially over. But I’m not holding my breath.

I finally updated my Amazon.com wish list, after almost 4 months of slow drain on the number of items left. It’s just chock full, now, which should occupy you gift-givers for at least the next year or so…

Too bad there’s no birthday or holidays around the corner now…


Posted in Geekdom on January 6th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Spent most of last night e-window-shopping, except for a few choice purchases. Including two new domains. No immediate plans to put them to use, but I at least wanted to grab ‘em up. I’ll prolly be doing little more today.

I’m actually quite proud that I avoided doing anything even marginally social last night. I like being anti-social. Anti-social behavior is good for Hyaena’s health…

I’m going to try to put up a new trip journal, before the trip itself gets too old to be report-worthy. No promises, though. I miss David. Luckily the stomach problems are officially over.

Happy Birthday…

Posted in Geekdom, Travel on January 11th, 2002 by Дмитрий

…To Amy. It’s foggy and chilly and I’m in good health. A rare combination, and I’m in a good mood today. All in all, I think this will be an exceedingly pleasant weekend…

I’m spending entirely too much time on the 2000 Census site today, which surely isn’t helping me lighten the load of work since I took over the job of two people last week. Luckily, we should be hiring a new phone and typing person next week, which will honestly reduce my workload by about 40%. I’m amazed at how much time I waste answering phones and typing insignificant piddly shit. If that’s off my back, I can actually devote my time to stuff that matters, like making sure the company isn’t going broke.

It will also mean that I can get around to scheduling my vacation for this coming spring. My goal is to actually come through on my revolving promise to visit Andrea and Cho (among others) in Seattle, and schedule stops in Portland and Vancouver/Victoria at the same time… I have a scary feeling that I might decide on relocating to the northwest once I’ve visited it…

Anyway, David is coming today. This is such a good thing, I won’t even say how much I’m anticipating it. Maybe more Fresno updates next week.


Posted in Geekdom on January 11th, 2002 by Дмитрий

From my search report, it looks like some of you have forgotten where I hid my dirty stories. If you really want to see them, I might reveal their location to you if you ask nicely.

I was glad to have something to replace the defunct Goth.Code. Enter The Blogger Code. Not quite so all-encompassing, but still manages to tell quite a bit about someone. So here I go:

B2 d+ t++ k- s u– f i o+ x+ e+ l+ c-


Monogamy as Bondage

Posted in Rants, Uncategorized on January 12th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Monogamy plays a very dubious role in our society today. It is seen as the highest of virtues by the majority of individiuals - whatever their moral alignment in most other matters. The reasons behind the worship of monogamy are based either on archaic religious mores or irrational philosophical premises, and the demands which such beliefs place on relationships often destroys otherwise great romances.

The primary root of most monogamy is religion. Most religions restrict sexual and romantic activity due to the common mystical perception that pleasure is a sin. Thus religions tend to prefer any moral alignment which restricts the prevalence or enjoyment of individual desires.

Other often-touted reasons for monogamy stem from the desire to have and keep a single, life-long partner. Needless to say, this premise has been proven flawed by history indubidubly. Whether through marriage or interpersonal agreement, the majority of romantic relationships are based upon monogamy. Unfortunately, this premise is in fact the root of the statistically tragic plight of romance in the world today.

Read more »


Posted in Geekdom on January 13th, 2002 by Дмитрий

David is gone, and I’m contemplating how to change the way calendars function so that I can spend more than 2 nights at a time with him… O well, impractical thoughts, I’m sure. Besides, the immense amount of sex is becoming somewhat detrimental to my sensitive winter skin…

At least I managed to make it to Tower Records, where I dropped a small chunk of my forthcoming Federal tax refund for a stack of CDs. I feel I must repeat this next week, when David hopefully will be taking me to Fry’s for printer shopping and to Berkeley for record shopping.

Now I’m busily absorbing a nice long Simpson-a-thon on KMPH. Not sure whether or not I’ll have time to do the updates I was planning tonight. But I’m finally getting the hang of my new toy. Music videos for local bands shouldn’t be too far away…

Formac Studio

Posted in A Life More Boring on January 14th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Still not completely getting the hang of the machine… But it’s at least helping me with my forthcoming updates… I think it may even be worth it, if it just turns out to be an expensive type of digital camera.

Nothing much to update today. I skipped Open Mic. Interviews tomorrow for the new receptionist. I’m already waiting for Friday.

Your Gravity, It Pulls Me Through…

Posted in Friends on January 15th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Superfluid Helium 3 has a new music download site at IUMA. It looks like I’m actually gonna have to brave the Gravity Bar in north Fresno in order to catch those guys next month… Pity.

In other news, the first day of interviews landed me who I think will be our next hire. I don’t want to write off tomorrow’s interviewees, but I really doubt anyone will be able to match the person we saw today. Finally, my application for friendship with a certain Becky lady has been graciously accepted. I’m blushing.

Here’s to a stress-free payday.

Preemptively Reactive

Posted in Fresno on January 17th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’ve been having this recurring dream where I’m just walking around the old Thrifty in Clovis, reading comics, eating ice cream, rummaging through the toy aisle, etc. For some reason, they’re really detailed dreams and yet nothing much happens in them. I think it has something to do with the fact that this particular Thrifty was closed down before the Rite Aid takeover, and thus it never got converted. It just sat there empty for years. Then yesterday whilst I was getting my lunch, I passed by the shopping center where it was, which has recently been remodeled. The Save Mart which was in the only occupied anchor tenant space had expanded to occupy the old Thrifty pad as well, and the remaining half of the center was being demolished. I guess I just missed occasionally passing by that center and seeing the sun-bleached fascia which still showed the ghost of the Thrifty sign on it. The last reminder of that good old Thrifty logo now gone forever…

I may have to explore the town for any others… I doubt there are any this far down the line, now, though.

I’m also about to take that leap into the world of high-speed internet, I think, considering that SBC is offering an intro promotion that I just can’t pass up… Yeah, I know, the promotions usually tend to get better as time goes on, and a year down the line there’ll probably be an even better deal. I also know I’ll probably get a bunch of anti-SBC hate mail now… But honestly, they currently have the best deal in this area. [I did in fact come to regret this decision within the next six months or so. My bad. - MCK 2003]

Speaking of this area, the frost is killing me. I’ve had my heater on for about 3 days straight now, and my apartment is still constantly chilly (I also don’t want to hear anything about how I’m exacerbating the “power emergency” with my love for warmth). I think it got down to about 28 last night (and I don’t want to hear anything from you north plains or Midwest people about how I don’t know what real cold is…).

How’s that for being a little preemptively reactive today?

I officially need it to be Friday. Friday night, preferably.

I’ve Changed my Primary Email 12 Times Since This Entry

Posted in Geekdom on January 17th, 2002 by Дмитрий

In case you haven’t noticed, I made my search utility a little artier and less obvious, since its use wasn’t exactly optimal anyway. Most people were using it to search for my dirty stories, not realizing that pages which aren’t linked within the site aren’t crawled by the search engine… So anyway, if you want to search now, just type it in the field in the navigation column and hit enter. Nothin’ special… And for some reason it still isn’t very efficient. I’ll have to look for a new provider soon if this keeps up.

Luckily, I’m pretty at home with my email now. Goodbye FadeToBlack/ EveryoneNet. Hello Yahoo! free email. Hey, sometimes the best things are also the cheap and easy things.

And you may go ahead with the SBC attack, as I called to check into getting my DSL today, only to find that they have yet to install it in two neighborhoods in Fresno, mine being one of those two…

Not sure if there’ll be any news until Monday. I’m off to the City to spend another weekend snogging with David, and pretty much being far happier than I have been this week. Which is saying a lot, considering that this week hasn’t been all that bad.


Posted in A Life More Boring on January 21st, 2002 by Дмитрий

Some people are really difficult when it comes to deciding how to politely shuffle them out of your life. I have never really been a fan of the hard-to-read or high-maintenance person, and thus I’ve decided that I need to distance myself from a certain someone who is really becoming too much of a burden for me. Unfortunately, I have certain fears that they may become sui-/homi-cidal or something. Anyway, we’ll see…

On the up side, I am back from a (way too brief) visit with David, who helped me relieve myself of large quantities of money (though I now realize that I spent alarmingly little for his personal benefit… O well…). I arrived home late last night with my first printer (a cute mini-porta-printer which will fit snugly into my laptop case), a stack of records, cds, and dvds, and even a couple new books. And here you thought I was forgetting how to read actual paper media.

I have yet to really get down and dirty with any of my new finds, but I promise to soon have some new features up on my personal section relating to my favorite flicks and books. They’ll probably resemble my desert discs page, just less systematic. I also plan to get to work on the Fresno section this week. I promise.

The only thing I regret about my visit to David was that once again my health left me somewhat incapacitated for a portion of my visit. This time, however, it was self-induced incapacitation. My previous health problem on New Years forbade me from celebrating with the traditional champagne toast, and my two-weeks delayed celebration got a little out of hand. I didn’t go so far as to be vomiting or anything, but I will confirm that champagne hangovers are the worst. I don’t plan to experience another.

I have been trying very hard to compose a Martin Luther King Jr. piece for Open Mic night, but after struggling with a tactful speech, I realized that the crowd at Fred’s is not of the caliber nor the demographic that I want my stuff heard by. I think the people who browse my essays in this site (though new essays have been slow in coming lately) are more appropriate consumers of my work. At least I know they’re viewing it voluntary; and because they’re reading it rather than having it recited to them, I think they are more likely to react rationally (even when they don’t agree with me).

Thus I’m back-burnering what I had written thus far, which included some of the following: Affirmative Action and Multiculturalism are the modern, politically-correct version of racism. Jesse Jackson will never even come close to Martin Luther King Jr., whether in terms of influence, intellect or respectability. Dr. King would have found the 90s yuppified “diversity” lobby a joke. America should stop having country-quotas for immigration - the only reason people are generally against open borders is because of the way immigrants tax the resources of a welfare state; if you get rid of the welfare state, there’s no reason to prohibit anyone from coming to America; the ability of people to succeed and get rich regardless of their history is why America is so powerful, not because of how kind, gentle or socially responsible the country is(n’t). People who are obsessed with rediscovering or preserving their “roots” are the most racist of all. Where you come from means nothing - where you’re going, and how you plan to get there means everything. The only visible reminder of the greatness of the Civil Rights Movement today is the emasculating habit of revisionist history. It is a sad reminder of lost greatness, indeed.

So, there you have it. Pity that Dr. King has become trivialized to the same profoundly disrespectful extent that we have trivialized Lincoln and Washington: I’ll never quite understand how anyone could feel gratified just to know that the bankers, lawyers and bureaucrats are sleeping in late in their honor.

The Den

Posted in A Life More Boring on January 22nd, 2002 by Дмитрий

Whilst roaming around Fresno taking some pictures for some new site features, I discovered that one of my old standby bars is open again. It used to be The Cave, now it’s called The Den. I have yet to step foot back inside since the reopen/change of name… Soon.

I’ve got some really irritated skin going on, and it’s not making me happy. I’ve stocked up on the over-the-counter remedies… If they don’t solve the problem by early next month, I’ll be visiting the dermatologist (much to the detriment of my budgeted splurges).

And Steve: if you’re still reading this regularly (like your bookmark at your old workstation suggested you were), I’ve got your Letter of Recommendation ready. My dad even signed it (and one for Erik). Hope the new job is going well… [Interestingly, this was a note out to Steven Washburn, who would two years later be arrested for embezzlement of the very company writing said letter of recommendation.]


Posted in Economics on January 23rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

Andrea mentioned the recent Kmart demise, and it made me reflect on all the hoopla about Enron lately.

Most people are parading Enron’s affect on the economy as proof that capitalism is bad. I beg to differ. Everyone who lost money in the Enron case deserves what they got. Including the pensioners, investors, speculators and governments. If you invest in something without properly understanding the viability of your returns, you get what you deserve. If you’re accepting the lies of dubious figures and even more dubious executives, you are merely paying for your lack of reserach or gullability. Capitalism promises the best way for smart people to get filthy rich. It also promises the best way for scoundrels and dunces to lose their shirts. Capitalism is thus synonymous with justice.

Then there’s Kmart, which has now burnt the company I work for, yet is still being allowed to stay in business. They call it “debt reoganization”, when in fact it’s involuntary debt forgivance. I think Ch11 bankrupcy should be illegal. If you can’t afford to pay your lenders or if you cook your books in order to trick the market, you shouldn’t stay in business *at all*.

Fortunately, it looks like Enron won’t be so lucky. I’ve actually been reading up quite a bit on the Enron debacle. In that case, credit raters, brokers, shareholders, customers, contractors and lenders all conspired to deny reality and ignore the law of identity, just so they felt secure about all the money they were pouring into a house-of-cards company. And then everyone gets surprised when they lose money over it. Verifies my position that in any situation, reality is the final arbiter.

One thing which always made me laugh about the “new” economy (when it was still a buzzword) was that the only thing all the new firms which were making up that new economy had in common was their ability to convince markets that they were viable even though they never turned a profit, and survived by geometrically increasing their debts. Sort of like most every other yuppie of my generation.

[2007 Note: Having since watched The Smartest Guys In The Room, I will confirm that I still feel this way. The fact that there were tons of people before and during the scandal who repeatedly wanted to say “something ain’t right” points to mass delusion as the only reason things like this happen. If you pretend everything is OK you start to believe that it is. Pity reality tends to catch up with you eventually.]

Rains in Velvet

Posted in A Life More Boring on January 24th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I have discovered the miracles of Gold Bond. I’ll leave that alone from there, though.

A new band is up on my local bands page - Rains In Velvet, a project among Vince and Eric from SleepyD, Marcos from Superfluid and a British boy named Simon, who knows how to wear jeans. I also changed the SleepyD pic on the page…

Family Guy is on, so I should be paying attention to it. Not sure whether to have a beer tonight or just pass out early. I’ll decide after Family Guy.

Enron Suicide

Posted in A Life More Boring on January 25th, 2002 by Дмитрий

It goes to show - fraud and lying are just another way people escape reality. And if you try to cheat reality to the extent that the head honchos at Enron have, reality will have its revenge.

I decided against the beer last night, since the last thing my skin needed was a dehydrating agent. Instead I decided to drop a Unisom and get an extra hour of beauty sleep. It worked rather well. I still can’t wait until it stops being so cold, though.

Glider is playing at Club Fred tonight. Hopefully the show is over early so that I can be off to see David early Saturday. Work hasn’t been too unpleasant lately, but my skin ailments combined with a generally foul mood make me really crave curling up with someone more benevolent than I’ve encountered so far this week…

New secretary starts Monday. Hope she works out. I’ll keep you posted…

New Secretary

Posted in Work on January 28th, 2002 by Дмитрий

New secretary started today. I’d be far less stressed if my dad weren’t so skeptical about her. I admit I was as well, at first, but after she pretty much had her whole job down by mid-day, I figured she was the right choice. Unfortunately, I have yet another mild bug today. I’m sure it has something to do with the cold cold walk I took from SOMA to Mission and back with David yesterday, combined with waking up to snow in Fresno this morning. The first time in about 3 years. And it’s definitely cold enough to recur tonight… If the clouds stick around.

Not so sure if those updates will happen this week after all… At the very least, I should have a couple small features ready after I take a cruise down the Belmont strip later this week. But no promises.

iPod en Route

Posted in A Life More Boring on January 29th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I ordered an iPod today. I’m just cooler than shit now.

No more snow. Thank bloody gawd. But it’s still way too fucking cold. I want to move to Palm Springs…

I have avoided the State of the Union like the plague. I think the thing is a joke these days. It was meant to be the President’s personal annual address to Congress, not an all-purpose televised pep talk, as it’s become. I’m peppy enough, don’t you think?

In a related rant, I’ve become more and more angry at all the idiots who put those flags on their cars back in September, and still have the same flags flying, only there’s little left of them but shreds of fabric. I can’t see how these jerks can possibly think they’re fooling anyone. Truly patriotic individuals should at least understand customary flag protocol. I guess it proves that the whole outbreak of patriotism on 11 September was pretty shallow indeed. But what can I expect?

I’ve been pretty patriotic most of my life, but I think that draws more from a deep, rational, abiding respect for the ideas upon which this country and its constitution were founded, and less from sentimental emotional things like flags or presidents or catch phrases…

Please, if you want to fly a flag, use a proper flag pole, and have a stationary object to affix it to, and destroy the flag as soon as it begins to show wear or fading. Don’t turn the symbol of America’s greatness into yet another meaningless bumper sticker.

Office Space

Posted in Work on January 31st, 2002 by Дмитрий

Another month comes to an end. Intriguingly, even though I put in 110% at work for a month, it turned out to be rather enjoyable converting the whole office over to my “system”. It’s good to be in charge, and be able to have things my way. Me? A control freak?

Now that the new secretary is lending a hand, I’m only putting in about 90%, which I figure is OK for the next month or so. I’ve got to balance things out, y’know…

But I came out of the deal very well: I’m making a ton more money, I’m getting to push people around and make things happen, and I’m feeling needed and secure with my job.

Combine that with the indubitably pleasant developments in my personal life (particularly revolving around onespecific person), and the relatively benevolent state of things around me, and I think this year promises to be better than the last few.

Now if only the weather wasn’t so dreadfully cold and if only my skin would stop being so dreadfully dry. I guess I can’t have it all…

Here’s to an optimistic Groundhog Day (since it’s unlikely that I’ll update before then).

iHunger Satiation Delayed

Posted in Mac on February 1st, 2002 by Дмитрий

The Apple Store officially has a sad reputation with me, now. Last month I ordered the ForMac Studio, which took 3 weeks to arrive, after I paid $15.00 for express delivery. Now I’ve ordered the iPod, back on Monday, to be shipped priority overnight. Fedex tracking tells me it should be delivered by NEXT Tuesday morning.

I’m sorry, when did “priority overnight” translate to “8 days from now”? I could see it taking 3 days or so: I order it on day 1, they ship it day 2, it arrives day 3. Even 4 days if they miss the cutoff time on day 2, is understandable. But 8 days???

Anyway, there’s my rant. I wish I were seeing David this weekend. But I guess it’s good to have at least one uncommitted weekend each month, and in this case, I have Lauren’s birthday to look after tomorrow night…

Random 0177041.2176

Posted in A Life More Boring on February 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

A big Happy Birthday to Lauren . I only wish I had more to offer you than a breakfast at Klein’s. But at least we chose the best place in Fresno for breakfast (at least the best non-Mexican place on Sundays).

There’s a song by The Sleepover Disaster called “Startime” which is currently my favorite song. I think I like it because it makes me think of David . It’s not really a song he ever mentioned, but for a variety of reasons I associate the song with him…

And right now I associate him with the fact that I will still be waiting 5 more days to see him. But like I said, maybe this absence thing is good in small quantities…

I hate Avery. I hate their labels, their crappy accompanying software and their web site. Just try using their CD-case labels and you’ll see what I mean. Why design a form like a CD insert and then not allow your software to typeset like a CD case insert? Useless useless, useless…


Posted in Site News on February 7th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Little did I know when I awoke Monday morning that by the week’s end my entire web presence would be so transformed. But here it is. Welcome to MurderingMouth. It’s basically the same as my previous site at TheHyaena.Net, except this site includes only the Journals and Essays (eg, the most popular parts) from TheHyaena. TheHyaena now houses my biographical section, the Fresno section and the Road Trips journals.

I know it will mess a lot of people up, having moved the more frequently updated and more popular sections, but I actually like this domain name better, and since the journals and essays (and dirty stories) are what I spend more time on anyway, I thought this would be a better place to park. 
But the whole decision was quite unexpected…

I woke up on Monday to find my mailbox stuffed full (I mean full - to where incomings were being bounced) with spam. I quickly blocked all incomings and took down the site as a precaution. Further research traced the problem to a suddenly reactivated but previously dormant prior account which had forwardiing turned on to my main box. Apparently the dormancy had not meant that messages were being bounced in the interim, and thus when it came back to life, it came with all the messages. I’d already made major realignments to the site, since I first assumed that the influx was to be blamed on the site’s contact form.

Anyway, I figured since I would have to do some work to get the site back up, I might as well make use of this domain and separate the more-updated and more-popular parts of the site from the more archival and less read areas. Most people would question the intelligence of moving the more popular sections to the new (unlinked, unbookmarked) domain, but it will probably stay here longer, since I like the name better, anyhow.

So there you have it. I shall be spending the rest of the evening working on a much-delayed dirty story. Once again, if you don’t know where I keep them, you have to ask…

The Ambivalence of Relationships

Posted in About Me, Family, Get In My Head on February 7th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’ve been having deams about a certain person a lot lately, and it has made me look once again at the whole sex-romance-relationship thing. It’s actually been a long time since I’d dreamt about someone. By this I mean actually transposing a real person in my life to a dream, in a realistic setting. I always know that someone is making a profound impact on my life when my dreams switch from freaky fantasies to everyday whimsy.

At least, that’s been one sign.

Others types of signs tend to revolve around my (often overactive) analytical approach to interpersonal relationships. I like to think that I can just go with the flow, regardless of who I’m with. But more often than not, I’m always integrating people into my larger ïscheme of things’.

Read more »

Dermatology 101

Posted in Health on February 8th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Well, I dropped over $300.00 at the dermotologist’s and the pharmacy yesterday, but after only 24 hours of antibiotic and topical steriod therapy, I’m back in the world of wankers with normal skin. I’m glad that money was put to use in a good way, even though it squeezes that new DVD player out of my budget for another couple months…

Unfortunately, having normal skin might put me in danger of frequenting net.porn far too often… Well, at least I’m building a good stash of porn featuring David. That stuff works better anyway…


Posted in Naughty on February 11th, 2002 by Дмитрий

So I managed to host David for yet another great weekend. We did the Mexican food, the romantic steakhouse dinner, hung out with all my favorite lesbians and saw a kick-ass show at Club Fred featuring Fastback 69 and los Creepers. Captured it all in digital sound, the cleaning up and editing of which will probably consume my next couple evenings.

I also reflected upon the fact that David is probably a real anomaly - not just for me but for anyone. Where else do you find a guy that is physically and intellectually stimulating (damn is he stimulating…) and can round it out with sex that is significant in both its quality and quantity? I mean - we have a lot of sex… And it’s all good sex… Yep, I think I’ve landed a keeper here…

Anyway, I guess I should stop being so mushy. But speaking of sex, there’s a new dirty story up. If you know where to find it, good for you, if not, ask me and I just might tell you.

Milosevic Has a Point

Posted in Economics on February 13th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’ve never been a fan of supernational law, and there is a very rational reason for this. By accepting citizenship of a nation, one accepts the rights of that nation’s government to enforce its law on oneself. An individual has as much a right to choose the state he wishes to live in as he has a right to be governed by consent. This is why majority rule must never infringe on individual rights (though it often does).

The fact is, Yugoslavia has never agreed to be accountable before any international body. Being a member of the United Nations does not obligate any individual state to participate in the institutions managed by that organization. The UN is effectively a mere NGO, and its institutions are member created, and all are voluntary. Even membership in the UN is voluntary. I admire the Swiss for their discipline in avoiding the irrational (and expensive) entanglements of membership in the UN or its institutions.

The fact that an international court is trying Milosevic for crimes which were not committed under any Court jurisdiction (as defined by the consent of the offender) is a mockery of justice. I admire Milosevic for his refusal to recognise the justice in the proceedings against him. His trial is analogous to Chechen rebells trying an ethnic Russian for not following Chechen Islamic law, or America trying a Saudi terrorist in an American court for crimes committed in Israel. In any case, a trial is only just when the court has a documented and recognised jurisdiction over the case at hand.

Milosevic has said that his trial is illegal. This is true. If he has committed crimes against specific Yugoslav or Albanian citizens or residents, it is the reposability of Yugoslavia or Albania (or the budding sovereignty of Kosovo) to try him. If they choose to delegate their jurisdiction to an international or foreign body (none of them have), then the trial would hold water. As it is, Milosevic is now a political prisoner, and as such, he is behaving appropriately at his “trial”. By refusing to enter a plea, he is justifiably withholding his consent and sanction from an alien court wishing to hold him responsible for laws he never agreed to be held accountable to.

Would that America would take heed to the persecution of Milosevic and his government, and quickly and decisively remove itself from these unjust and wicked international organizations - the United Nations being the worst. I have written my congressmen: “Get us out, now! .” Would that others followed suit…

Rain Dogs

Posted in Family on February 14th, 2002 by Дмитрий

A somewhat sleepless night last night, but it wasn’t entirely a bad thing. I listened to “Rain Dogs” on repeat for a while and contemplated some things. I even had a revelation or two. It was significant. Tell my instant messenger it will be neglected for the forseeable future. Tell the bars they’ll probably not be seeing much of me. Tell Fresno to enjoy me while she can. And happy Valentine’s Day to you. Now if only I’d figured out just how mushy or explicit I was allowed to be in this journal…

Reach Out and Crush Someone

Posted in Health on February 14th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I hate AT&T now. And it has nothing to do with the Carrot Top campaign. I’m not going to go into it, now though. I’ll just ruin what was a wonderful blood pressure diagnosis this morning: 114/82.

That’s almost a miricle for me. I (and Doc) think it has a lot to do with quitting smoking back on New Years. Doc has now told me to quit caffine. That will be substantially harder, as it is more tied-up in my day-to-day activity, and I’m far more addicted to it than I was nicotine. I only smoked socially, never in my home, and usually less than 2 packs per week. I enjoy caffinated beverages morning noon and night, alone and in social settings, with meals and without, and in quantity. I prefer sugarless sodas, and it’s often difficult to find those elusive caffine-free-diet sodas in all venues. It will be a chore to start having to say “just water, thanks”.

I’m sure I’ll manage… And sorry Becky for losing your link when the site moved. Thanks for the special Valentine’s words.

Travel Plans

Posted in Family, Travel on February 15th, 2002 by Дмитрий

In only a few more hours, I’ll be hosting my favorite fellow traveler for a special Valentine’s version of our usual weekend together. Complete with a Saturday evening session with Sippy & Old Guzzler.

And speaking of travelling, I thought I’d mention that I will be visiting the great Northwest with this very same person in early April, and he has inspired the idea in me that I should bring along the iBook, just in case there’s some important stuff worth cataloguing. Along those lines, if anyone has any suggestions as to cheap divy motels, diners, cheap divy restaurants or places to avoid, or even roadside attractions that I might otherwise miss, please let me know . I have this sinking suspicion that I will be falling in love with Portland when I visit it… We’ll see. I’m sure there will be more on this subject as the trip draws nearer.

Hungry and tired. As expected, the decongestants left me with precious little sleep for a second night in a row. But at least tonight I’ll have a legitimate reason (aka “sex”) for not getting to sleep early… Now to contemplate lunch…


Posted in About Me on February 15th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Because I’m no longer likely to take any new applicants, I decided to note as much on my Ideal Personal. I still think it was a good witty bit of writing on my part, though, so I’m going to at least keep it available for your continued perusal.

I never thought I’d feel so great about no longer caring whether anyone answered a personal of mine…

Mushy #140740

Posted in Family on February 17th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I bid David goodbye about an hour ago… As always, I have this dopey giddy grin on my face and I’m a combination content with having spent such a woonderful weekend with him and sad that we always have to part ways. I honestly can’t wait until our trip, when I get to spend 9 whole days with him…

Hopefully that doesn’t spoil me and make even 9 days too short. I’m sure it will. Now who among you all are being totally cheesed out by my recent mushiness? Good.

Site News

Posted in Site News on February 19th, 2002 by Дмитрий

So what’s going on at TheHyaena.Net? Good question. Even I’m not sure. All I know is that I’ve been very slow at getting out and getting new content for that site, and I doubt my apathy will change any time soon. I have wanted to start getting back into tape/CD trading, and start having some more substantial content on Fresno and the road trips so that I can move those sections to their already-acquired domains.

And yet, and yet and yet… I just can’t really find the motivation. I’ve had a bit of atrophy in my infatuation with Fresno, due primarily to the facts that I’m tired of my job and that my significant other isn’t here. I want to eliminate both of those problems, but I still think that Fresno has a lot to offer me, and that I have a service to offer it via my web-work. We’ll see.

I love Fresno, but I need to change my scenery soon, otherwise I may grow to see this place more as a prison than a playground. I may return, but only if the break is amicable. The longer I stay, the less likely that is to happen.

So there you have it - I haven’t abandoned my previous home, I just don’t really know how much I care anymore… Maybe I’ll get around to caring again. Just not now.

Smoke and Mirrors

Posted in Economics, Fresno on February 20th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’m glad we’re finally taking the Bay Area to court. We may not (and I actually hope we don’t) enforce anything as far as actually reducing Bay Area pollution production, but hopefully the end result of the case is an affirmation that making the Central Valley responsible for 100% of its air quality problems overlooks the fact that most of our pollution sees its source esewhere.

Anyone who knows my political opinions would understand that I’m in no way a fan of environmental laws, epecially when they get in the way of commerce. But in the recent case, Sacramento is trying to tell their southern counterparts that we need to reduce our smog or lose the federal money that we produced but that they control. This pisses me off even more, and thus think we need some sort of official recognition that most (yes, most) of the San Joaquin basin’s pollution is produced in the Bay Area.

Ultimately, industrial pollution is a side effect of freedom and affluence. We should welcome it. But here we’re dealing with a catalogue of irrational laws - we have to know which to attack first - and I think the “total responsibility” part is a good place to start.

Goth Code

Posted in About Me on February 21st, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’ve searched for this for years and finally stumbled upon an old archive of it. I thought it would be a novel addition to all the other .Net-Codes I’ve been tossing out lately. But if you want to decode it, you’ll have to be as snoopy as I was today…


GoSS7Bu5$ TYyuJtZ cLBRZ1 PG10Sa6E3 M2p3gD ZGo*PuoEx*MegIp*Ja* C7om a24- b55 H178 g5T w5 r3E h4 s1 k5 Rn SrNy N0196 LusCA

I love that code… It’s the most descriptive I ever came accross… Anyone know of an even better one?

Bar Hopping

Posted in Misanthropy on February 21st, 2002 by Дмитрий

It was an alarmingly nice day today, and the smell in the air on my commute home was almost reminiscent of May or June. It put me in an alarmingly good mood, so much so that I decided to take a rare weeknight trip to one of Fresno’s less offensive pubs to have a couple glasses of sin before bed.

Now why is it that jerks at bars can always sense the people that are just there to zone out and enjoy themselves, and always manage to ruin a perfectly good mood accompanied by a second pint of Newcastle? Anyway, I cut my outing short in order to avoid this unpleasant element. Reminds me why I don’t really go out very often anymore - especially alone.

But tomorrow I’m gonna see David, and since that’s what’s really getting me through the week, I’m over the unpleasantness already.


Posted in A Life More Boring on February 26th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Sorry to those who have been fruitlessly hoping for updates the past few days. This isn’t really one. I just wanted to advertise my voting habits by displaying what I’m voting for in California’s odious primary election:

Superior Court 1: Jim Oppliger 
Superior Court 13: Vince McGraw 
Superior Court 16: John Vogt 
State Superintendent: Lynne Leach 
County Superintendent: Pete Mehas 
Assessor: Bob Werner 
Controller: Paul Dictos 
Clerk: Victor Salazar 
D.A.: Elizabeth Egan 
Coroner (my personal favorite): Loralee Cervantes 
Sheriff: Dick Pierce 
City Council 1: Tom Boyajian

I’m voting “NO” on all measures except 42. 42 will allocate the gas tax strictly to infrastructure (theoretically). Every other measure either puts our state or county in more debt or infriges on the rights of some minority (usually businesses or the wealthy).

For those of you searching with baited breath for which party candidates I’m voting for, I apologize, but as a non-partisan voter, it’s pretty useless for me to vote for candidates when the parties reserve the right to reject my vote. I’ll wait until November for them to do that.

New Alanis disc to buy, then I’m fasting in the music area until the end of March. I’ve had both a new rant and a new dirty story brewing, but I’m not in the mood today. Still soliciting suggestions for my trip to Portland & Seattle next month. Full-serve gas anyone?

Copper River

Posted in Fresno on February 27th, 2002 by Дмитрий

After a lengthy battle, Fresno has beat out Clovis in the fight over who gets to annex Copper River. I must say that it’s refreshing that people are actually clamouring to join Fresno. It’s a rare departure from the old-hat snubbing shown by the snobbish county islands such as Sunnyside, Fig Garden and Fort Washington, who continue to deny annexing. I’m sort of a Fresno supremiscist, and a statistics whore, and those combine to make me happy about any news of growth in Fresno. I have this fantasy of Fresno one day beating San Francisco population-wise (it has already beat Long Beach to become #5 in the state - not bad for being #3 in terms of total land area).

My fantasy was almost crushed a few years back when Madera approved the Children’s Hospital Development on the 41 corridor, since it meant the city would be jumping over the San Joaquin river and into Madera rather than continuing to grow within Fresno County. New growth in southern Madera will continue to leach some growth out of Fresno for the forseeable future, and the possibility of an LA County-Orange County type of seamless metro area is a good prediction, to which I don’t really object per se. But I still want Fresno to be the statistical beneficiary. And with the renewed interest in the Copper River area and the forthcoming extension of 180 into the Kearny-Kerman area should spark some new suburban growth in this often neglected but very promising region. Of course, this wouldn’t matter if this was back east, where the city growth isn’t subject to county boundaries.

Horray for Fresno. And if it’s any consolation, I don’t mind if Clovis gets Tarpey. Clovis deserves the trailer trash. It is Klovis Klan Kountry, after all - and Tarpey is where the burning crosses feel most at home. They can annex that if they really need some growth. But that kind of growth might be a little too much like a tumor, I guess. Whatever.

It Tastes Like Emptiness…

Posted in Family on March 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

Sunday breakfasts just aren’t the same without you, baby.

Web Design

Posted in Geekdom on March 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

Why is it that I have yet to find a web editing program that actually makes managing my site EASIER?!

I’ve now spent a whole day on each of FrontPage, GoLive!, and DreamWeaver, over the past few months. All of them are both way too complicated and way too difficult to use to make it worth my time. I guess I’m just destined to stick with the trusty old world of raw HTML. I knew I was better at that, anyway…

Now to turn off my computer before my frustration at failing at yet another task prompts me to throw the iBook against the wall… Ugh…

I Weep for You, Sweiz.

Posted in Economics on March 3rd, 2002 by Дмитрий

[This was a comment on Switzerland's decision that day to join the UN... centuries and centuries of rational government brought to an end in one simple majority vote...]

Trip Plans 2

Posted in Travel on March 4th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I forgot to mention Saturday that it’s only 4 weeks (less, now) until my superfun road trip to the Great Northwest with David. It’s gonna be hecka hecka fun. I’ll be visiting my old old old old buddy Andrea, doing some down & dirty book shopping and even downer and dirtier snogging with David. Not to mention the fact that I’ll be spending a whole 8 days with said person, which will be the best part of the trip.

Damn, I miss you.


Posted in Americana on March 5th, 2002 by Дмитрий

The best thing about the latest WTC replacement proposal is that the designers start out by declaring their particular memorial to the World Trade Center be temporary. I find it inspiring and comforting that the people of New York appear, for the most part, to be shrugging off the rhetoric of the odious Giuliani and his exiting declaration that the site of the WTC be put to no commercial use.

It pleases me that New Yorkers haven’t lost the commercial resilience and drive which made their city the greatest in the world. After all, it is industry and trade which has made them great, not symbolism or martyrdom. Despite what Mr. Giuliani would like to think, New York isn’t a “symbol” or a “beacon” but rather a motor, well-oiled and ready to get back to work. Thank you New York. For everything you do , in addition to everything you are.


Posted in A Life More Boring on March 5th, 2002 by Дмитрий

A police helicopter has been circling my neighborhood for almost an hour now, and it’s getting kinda scary…

On top of that, my email isn’t working, though it obviously has nothing to do with my internet connection, conssidering I’m able to do this update…

I should have DSL by the end of the week, thankfully…

Damn police chopper. Hopefully I don’t get kidnapped this evening…

Smear Campaign

Posted in Americana on March 6th, 2002 by Дмитрий

One recent politician’s ad in particular has annoyed me as I drove around Fresno the past couple of months: It shows a certain State Assembly candidate with his ugly daughter and two ugly sons and his rather homely wife, all lovvy dovvy for the camera, with the heading “He’s one of us!”.

Oh, is he? Well, I live alone. I don’t have any ugly children, and I sure as hell don’t regularly run for political office. I doubt most Fresnans would disagree. Fresno (despite it’s higher-than-average proportion of Mormons and trailer trash) matches closely the new Census discovery that (gasp!) most households aren’t Cleaver-style. It’s no longer the suburbia of Ma, Pa, an hier and a spare. Rather we have lots of housholds in our suburban conglomerations these days: unmarried couples, single parent families, roommate households, queer households, empty nests, etc. Just trying to symbolically splash your dubious “family values” won’t get you elected when the majority of the voting public consists of pensioners who are twice your age and college activists who are half your age. Oy.

Trade Free

Posted in Economics on March 6th, 2002 by Дмитрий

Anyone who knows their history remembers that world trade barriers were at historical highs during the Great Depression. For some reason, world governments saw tariffs and sanctions as a method of stimulating (!) their economies. The result? More than a decade of stagnation worldwide. 
Since when were higher prices, making enemies and restricting trade a good idea?

I could go on for pages and pages about how tariffs do nothing to repair dying industries, and how American steel ain’t no better than Korean steel, but I guess I’m being presumptuous by assuming it’s self-evident. Steel is steel. Dubya is being yet another special-interest toy by slapping tariffs on foreign products of any type, regardless of his excuse. If Koreans are willing to dump steel on us at a loss, all the better. Our prices for cars and other products will go down. That’s the market. It’s not our responsibility to check the morals or motives of our peers or trading partners. Winning bidders take all.

Would that American politicians realized that if you free your trade, the rest will follow…

The Toilets, CA

Posted in Travel on March 7th, 2002 by Дмитрий

I’ve been spending way too much time here lately. At least it distracts me from the fact that I haven’t been spending enough time at all with him.

But that will be changing tomorrow. My first time in Los Banos for something other than gas, fast food or a driveby. And I’ll be there with my favorite person. Yay. Los Banos is one of those towns that’s always screamed “explore me!” And now I will.

Expect a full travelogue (as well as some older ones which I’ve neglected posting) at TheHyaena sometime next week…

Heal the Separation

Posted in Family on March 8th, 2002 by Дмитрий

The day is going slowly, but that’s probably because I’m aching with anticipation to see David tonight. I’ve really gotta do something about this 200 mile separation. Soon…