Today’s Bullet-List

Posted in About Me on January 9th, 2006 by Дмитрий
  • My first real Xmas celebration - on Xmas, with hubby and family and tree and all - was immensely fun and I’m sad it’s over.
  • I’m contemplating the possibility of entering the real estate market in a Carolina community other than Charlotte.
  • I’m officially a telecommuter.
  • I’m enjoying porn more than usual lately.
  • I’m enjoying being home with the hubby very much.
  • I’m liking the friends I’ve made since I got to the East Coast.
  • I head back to San Francisco on the 21st, and will most likely spend more time updating when I’m there.
  • I really should update, considering I’ve got tons of pictures and stories from the past couple months I’ve failed to share.

Get Out

Posted in Sods on January 10th, 2006 by Дмитрий

Closet cases bug me in every way imaginable.


If you are not queer, you most likely won’t have a problem with being “falsely” branded as queer by some random asshole, and the truth will more likely than not come out when you bang your next opposite-sexed person.


If you are queer and trying to play it all secret-like, you have earned my sincere disrespect and can expect me to be first in line with the hatchet at your closet door. Going to great lengths to conceal your preferences presupposes a guilty conscience and a large degree of self-loathing. People that talk about “wanting to keep their private life private” are queer haters, and no different from the fagbashing frat boys who say stuff like “they can do what they want as long as I don’t have to see it”.


Your sexual preference is not part of your “privacy” - as soon as you fiddle with someone’s genitals, your sexual preference becomes public domain.

Why Chinese is Good for You

Posted in Economics, Rants on January 15th, 2006 by Дмитрий

The rise of modern China is one of the most lamented events in the news today. never before have I seen such an inevitable occurrence be so roundly loathed from every desk and aisle and corner of the globe (save, of course, China and the Chinese diaspora itself). I, for one, think this is wholly wrong-headed.

The primary reasons I hear to disdain the rise of modern China include its autocratic government and that government’s consequent effect on the lives of the Chinese themselves, the alleged economic losses China’s rise will supposedly precipitate in the current dominant world economies, and the security threat posed by a wealthy, powerful, populous China. I’m open to anyone who can provide additional objections, but these three seem to sum up all the ones I’ve heard til now.

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Social Networking and Popularity Contests

Posted in Misanthropy on January 17th, 2006 by Дмитрий

I know I needn’t complain about things I needn’t subject myself to, but I notice a large number of people - on LiveJournal, MySpace, all the social-networking sites - tend to collect ‘friends’ numbering in the 100s… If you use your journal/site to advertise your music/work I can see this, as it allows you to individualize your advertising and be better at ‘direct marketing’. But I doubt this many people are actually advertising their shows or art with their weblog/site. Rather, as someone mentioned in my previous post, it seems like a popularity contest.


I don’t really care much for popularity - I’ve never been very popular, and I doubt I ever will. The key for me is that I only have so much room for ‘friends’ - meaning people I want to interact with either in person or online.


The Economist had an article about evolution in their Xmas issue, which alluded to the idea that in ‘real life’, humans tend to aggregate into bands of about 150, even in our post-hunter-gatherer world. We tend to lose touch with distant relatives if we have a large immediate family, and lose track of old friends when we make new ones. In most cases, I tend to scoff at arguments for the hard-wiredness of human behavior. What I do agree with, however, is that the scope of a human’s ability to remember faces and quickly recall data about a person’s character and history is limited.


Technology has widened the scope of our ability to maintain contact with distant people, and better-enabled us to communicate and forge bonds with people we would otherwise not know at all. However, it does little in the way of help us better manage the masses of personal information we are inherently capable of managing.


I’ve got several dozen friends and family that are not online, and if you add in the people who have websites outside of the social networking sites, I’d say there is room for 75-100 interesting souls that I could keep up with and genuinely care about knowing. That’s why I tend to revise my contact lists often - when I find new people I want to keep up on, I have to decide whether I want to keep up with them more than the more marginal members of my existing list.


This is why when I see someone who is not a DJ/musician/artist/shopkeeper who has like 1000 people in their ‘friends’ list, I simply wonder ‘why?’.

The Password You Have Attempted is Not Valid

Posted in Get In My Head, Work on January 20th, 2006 by Дмитрий

I hate passwords. They were specifically designed by the software industry to make our lives hell and remove any blame for that state of hell from themselves. “O, well, you failed to give yourself a secure password, so it’s not our fault you got hacked”. “O, you forgot your password, then we’ll have to give you a tomato flogging and an anal probe and then maybe if you let us fuck your mother we’ll change it for you, and maybe even tell you what we’ve changed it to.”

Depending on what security software a website, program or file is using, there are about 5,000 different standards of password protocol. Like “must end in a number”, “must not end in a letter”, “must contain at least 3 numbers and 2 letters and one of the following special characters: [email protected]#$?>:(”, “must have three numbers followed by four letters followed by two more numbers whilst still being only 8 characters total and utilizing no ‘m’ or ‘6′ and cannot look like your name or sound like anyone you know when phonetically pronounced in a Semitic language”.

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The San Francisco Treat

Posted in San Francisco, Travel on January 21st, 2006 by Дмитрий

I made two distinct changes to my trip this time around that I’m already immensely happy about:


  1. I flew nonstop on USAir rather than deal with AirTran’s horrible layovers and customer service
  2. I checked into a hotel in the far-flung Inner Richmond, away from the bustle of the tourist areas. It’s cheaper than any other hotel I could find, but the sheets, bedspread, furniture and all seem almost new. It’s got a big TV, a fridge and a microwave. I think I’ll like it here, especially since it’s only a few steps from my favorite neighborhood on the other side of Park Presidio.

So I’m here. Again.

You Know You’re in San Francisco When…

Posted in San Francisco on January 22nd, 2006 by Дмитрий

…During your first bus ride of the day you overhear:


“I was at the Kimberly Clark protest this morning. They cut down Old Growth Forests.”


“That’s cool. I’m writing a paper about all the uses hemp has. It’s so stupid that Prohibition is keeping us from having better clothes and paper and stuff, just coz the government doesn’t want the people to have hemp.”


I’ve decided that I will from now on buy only products containing a minimum 10% Old Growth Forest content. Besides, Spotted Owl is yummy.

O Canada

Posted in Canadophilia on January 24th, 2006 by Дмитрий

Poor souls who have spent the past year or so plotting to escape our emerging fascist dictatorship for the great white north needn’t feel too disheartened by the shift in political balance on the other side of the 49th.


  • “Right wing” in Canada is sort of like Hillary Clinton in the US.

  • Trying to revoke legal marriages months or years after they’ve been approved is, as Massachusetts is learning, exceedingly difficult.

  • Canada will still probably have better finances than the US for years to come, if not for ever at this point.

  • After my first winter on the East Coast, I’m convinced that the US has nothing but pussy winters.

  • No one as creepy-looking as Stephen Harper can possibly be kept in office for long without the arrival of the apocalypse.

So don’t lose hope. Someday you may be able to take those French classes, or find a marriage of convenience with one sex or another, or get a job for an oil company.


Just remember to leave your porn and fetish supplies behind when loading up the UHaul.

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Screeds for your Friday Enjoyment

Posted in Media on January 27th, 2006 by Дмитрий

I’m not a big fan of movies in general, but two recent movies (or at least their marketing and word-of-mouth, as I have not seen them) annoy me immensely: Brokeback Mountain and Nanny McPhee.


Nanny McPhee is being marketed as “The New Mary Poppins”. This may be potentially true as far as the story/plot goes (again, I’ve not seen it), but in terms of aesthetics, it is massively insulting to Mary Poppins. Mary Poppins was Practically Perfect in Every Way - Julie Anrdrews was gorgeous and stylish, with rosy cheeks and beautifully controlled hair. Nanny McPhee is self-consciously ugly - that seems to be a primary plot point, in fact. I assume the reason is that we are to be reminded that “looks don’t matter” (another misguided postmodern perception that no one ever takes seriously, I might add), but that alone should be a reason to avoid comparisons with Poppins, whose appearance alone was an important part of the story.


Brokeback Mountain’s mere existence has been pissing me off for months. I’ve skimmed past redundant reviews of the thing and seen numerous journalers comment on how “groundbreaking” it is… No - King of the Hill featuring the Gay Rodeo five years ago on prime-time TV was more ground-breaking, and even that wasn’t. I listen to sissy metrosexual straight guys talk about how important the movie is, thinking that it makes them seem sensitive and cosmopolitan. It don’t. I’m sick of these faggy coming-of-age-homo-martyr movies. If you want a movie about faggotry, fine. Just don’t try to act like it’s some huge important event. Fags have had movies for decades; Hollywood’s been out of the closet since the 50s. Homos aren’t victims anymore - just pussies who prefer to have people feel sorry for us than to stand up for ourselves, most of the time. The mere fact that every bit of commentary on Brokeback Mountain seems to play the ‘justice to sods’ card is proof that homos have a long way to go in seeing themselves as equals in society, a prerequisite for obtaining any semblance of ‘equality’.


Another jarring thing I came to realize last night is that there are now quite regular Spanish-language commercials on many English-language channels here in SF. The jarring part is that I didn’t even give it much notice until last night - either because the music of foreign tongues is one of the attractive parts of being in SF or because I’m growing immune to commercials in general (or at least the ones that don’t show some new shiny gadget I’m interested in).


A news story from the other morning: “Why staring can help you get a date - details on this new and increasingly popular technique” (italics mine). Now, pardon my stupidity, but isn’t this called cruising? And haven’t fags been doing it for decades/centuries? And didn’t straight people pick up on it quite a while ago as well? This ain’t news, especially not in Homo-Central.


I have more, but this entry’s too long already…

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More Sodomite Misogyny

Posted in Misogyny on January 30th, 2006 by Дмитрий

One thing most sods never manage to fully enjoy is the ability to mould their dwelling into something which matches their personalities as men - interior decorating is so soggy with femininity that even men who have absolutely no reason to use feminine ideas to treat their home tend to do it anyway, since pop culture gives them so few immediate alternatives.


I’ve never - NEVER - met a straight guy who had a masculine dwelling - even in the loosest sense of that term. Even the most misogynist wife-beating macho straight guys have flowery frilly master bedrooms and pastels pastels pastels everywhere. It seems to have gotten worse over the years - I remember growing up in the late 70s/early 80s when our home was all dark wood panelling and olive green carpet - it was at least marginally mannish.


My parents’ current home is all pastels and cream carpeting, blonde oak furniture and floral prints. It would be less alarming if I could convince myself it’s just homemaker trends which will pass with time, but I think there’s something more sinister under the surface…


Anyway, I decided long ago that when I had control over my abode (read: when I buy a house - hopefully within the next year), there will exist not a single intentional pastel in the place. I want a 60s mod house full of burnt oranges, pea greens and crimson reds. Dark wood panelling and shit-brown shag carpet. I’m fortunate to live with a man who equally values a more classical concept of a living space, and probably has some even more radical ideas than I on removing our abode as far as possible from frilly 90s suburban soccer momhood.


I won’t even go into the bastardizations of a powerful business environment that have happened to modern office spaces. If they aren’t non-functional post-modern disasters, they’re bland, whitewashed soccer-mom storage cabinets. The past few decades have seen a predominantly male business class replaced with a primarily female office class - even the half of the offices composed of men are composed of the sexless metrosexualized boy-things that belong more in Banana Republic ads than behind computer screens.

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News Rant

Posted in Media on January 31st, 2006 by Дмитрий

E! shares a channel with Bloomberg here. How much more inappropriate a pairing could there be? Luckily, E! is only on from 8am-2am, so I get to see my stock crack in the morning. Alas, that all changed this morning because we all know that live coverage of the Oscar nominations is more important than global finance and business news…


And why, oh why, is commercial news so addicted to live coverage? In 98% of all instances in which it is used, it is unnecessary. Live coverage is appropriate for major political speeches and breaking emergency news events, but it’s used for everything from minor interviews with non-celebs to being “live on the scene” hours or days after anything happened at said scene. How many times does one have to see a reporter in front of a dark store at 5.30am talking about the fact that it was robbed 18 hours ago?


Not only unnecessary, the addiction to live coverage makes news virtually unwatchable/unlistenable to me. I’d say about every 15 minutes of news I watch, I see at least one instance of the anchors having to interrupt those they’re interviewing or those on the street reporting because they’re ‘out of time’ - meaning they’ve lost control of their commercial fill. If they were pre-recording and pre-editing, their news cast would be glossy and professional, rather than jarring and annoying.


Oh, but I forgot. News is not about conveying knowledge and information, it’s about building celebrity and puffing up the self-importance of the reporter (or in the case of Fox News, the network). It’s not about the news, but about the newscaster’s relationship with the news. You don’t have to look any further than that skinny cracker piece of you-know-what Anderson Fucking Cooper, whose smirking mug is arguably more annoying than President Bush’s, not to mention the fact that it’s smeared on my TV more often than the President’s. That’s because he’s such an insightful reporter, able to whip up tears by patting the head of a Katrina survivor or whip up anger talking about the injustices in the world or whip up courage chatting with Iraqi soldiers (that’s called sarcasm, kiddies!).


Gawd, I hate commercial news. I want my fucking NPR. Or at least my fucking Economist.

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